


The Academy: After Hours

by Spectre_Cainus



Series: DR Ninjago AU [4]
Category: Lego Ninjago
Genre: 'adult humour', 1337 hax, F/F, F/M, M/M, Multi, Piss, adults being super immature, don't expect a snork version of this anytime soon, lots of people accusing others of being bottom bitches, the only true top is doctor julien, this is a huge shitpost
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-04
Updated: 2018-01-21
Packaged: 2019-02-10 15:00:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,368
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12914349
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Spectre_Cainus/pseuds/Spectre_Cainus
Summary: Kai makes a server and adds anyone he can.((Non-Despair groupchat fic of The Academy.NOTHING THAT HAPPENS IN THIS FIC IS CANON. AT ALL.))





	1. does neuro is norman???

**Author's Note:**

> this is a multi-chapter fic, so enjoy
> 
> idk if you can even say this is ooc, sometimes people type a lot differently than the way they talk
> 
> oh and the people who are gonna be introduced in the sequel get to be in this thing too, yay for cryptor
> 
> ALSO THERE IS QUITE A BIT OF SEXUAL HUMOUR IF YOU CAN CALL IT THAT SO YEAH

**kei:** okay so did everyone do their part

 **llyd grmdn** : Trying to teach Uncle Wu to use a keyboard is exhausting, he won’t be joining us for a very long time

**stronk boi** : did we have to add our parents to this? i don’t want my dad yelling at me for swearing later.

**Zane** : I agree with Cole. This server was meant for us students to communicate outside of class, not the entire school.

**Sky’s the limit** : fuck that noise, add ‘em kai

**kei** : you might experience some turbulence as i aggressively add everyone we have so far 

 

_**...** _

 

**kei** : holla, mi amigoes

**Doctor Julien** : May I inquire as to what this entire server is for?

**Neuro** : Same here. We didn’t give you guys our UNs for this.

**Griffin** : holy shit nerdo’s here

**Neuro** : …hello to you as well, Turner.

 

_**kei** changed **Neuro** ’s nickname to: **nerdo**_

 

**Griffin** : thanks kai you get the day off tomorrow

**kei** : awesome

**nerdo** : No, he does not.

**kei** : boo you suck

**Doctor Julien** : Zane? Cole? Do either of you wish to give an explanation?

**kei** : well you see doc

**kei** : we formally invite you three to the grand opening of the

 

_**kei** changed the channel name: **Twink Glory Holes Inc.**_

 

**Griffin** : the only twink here is nerdo

**Griffin** : maybe doc if you stretch the definition of twink a bit

 

_**stronk boi** changed **Griffin** 's nickname to: **twink radar**_

 

**twink radar** : hell yes

**twink radar** : hey normy can you rescout me

**nerdo** : NO!

**twink radar** : damnit

**Zane** : This server was initially meant for us students to communicate outside of class. However, Kai got the not-so-brilliant idea of adding the teachers in the Academy here as well.

**stronk boi** : ^^

**stronk boi** : you three are our first victims, congratulations.

**stronk boi** : also mister turner i’m 101% sure that shade’s also a twink

**stronk boi** : wait who the fuck is normy

**twink radar** : oh shit

**twink radar** : now i’m gonna get killed by norman giles tonight

**twink radar** : the current talent scout’s gonna fuck me to death with a huge horse dildo

**nerdo** : GRIFFIN. 

 

_**twink radar** changed **nerdo** ’s nickname to: **Norman**_

 

**twink radar** : _gasp_ plot twist

**Norman** : …

**Doctor Julien** : This is… quite entertaining.

**twink radar** : thanks for giving me this power @kei

**twink radar** : i will grasp it firmly

**twink radar** : maybe stroke it a lil

**Doctor Julien** : I changed my mind. This place is cursed.

**Norman** :  _ **What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.**_

**Sky’s the limit** : omg

**Sky’s the limit** : QUICK LLOYD TAKE A SCREENSHOT OF THAT AND POST IT TO THE SCHOOL NETWORK

**llyd grmdn** : already done

**twink radar** : normy how could you sink to shade's level of memes

 

_**Sky’s the limit** changed **Norman** ’s nickname to: **maymay master**_

 

**Sky’s the limit** : or triple M for short

**Zane** : Isn’t that a brand?

**Sky’s the limit** : well yes but that’s 3M not triple M

**twink radar** : hang on i can make it better

 

_**twink radar** changed **maymay master** ’s nickname to: **maymay daddy**_

 

**twink radar** : _fans self_

**kei** : holy shit

**kei** : mister turner you call neuro daddy???? 

**twink radar** : even if i did i’d never get that sweet ass of his

**twink radar** : jk he doesn’t have any ass

**maymay daddy** : …I’m leaving.

 

_**maymay daddy** left **Twink Glory Holes Inc.**_

 

**twink radar** : damnit

**Doctor Julien** : …ping me if he ever comes back. His denial of his feelings towards Turner is extremely entertaining.

**Doctor Julien** : Also, I am telling Brookstone about your swearing. @stronk boi

**stronk boi** : **_shit_**


	2. spicy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> lou gets added for hot spicy dramas

_**Doctor Julien** added **Neuro** to the group. _

_**Doctor Julien** added **Griffin** to the group. _

 

**Doctor Julien** : May I ask which one of you shared our usernames with the children?

**Neuro** : I shared mine with Skylor, but I made her promise to never give it out to the other students.

**Neuro** : So much for that.

**Griffin** : cole’s had mine since the start of the school year

**Griffin** : and I've got better things to do than get added to a glory hole company

**Neuro** : Are you really taking them seriously?

**Griffin** : I’m not the one who got butthurt and left

**Doctor** **Julien** : Hang on, I think I know who told them our usernames.

**Doctor** **Julien** : Giles, is Skylor proficient in hacking?

**Neuro** : If you mean “sneaking into the staffroom to steal biscuits and Cam’s coffee”, then yes.

**Doctor** **Julien** : oh no

**Neuro** : ?

**Griffin** : oh boy

**Griffin** : normy be happy you aren’t in the chat rn

**Neuro** : ???

 

...

 

**stronk boi** : dad pls

**lou lou** : Cole Brookstone, you're grounded and that's final.

**kei** : @jules i cant believe you betrayed your fourth son

**jules** : Brookstone, please compose yourself.

**lou lou** : No.

**kei** : ooo brutal shutdown from lou lou

**sanic** : lmao who the fuck added him and changed his nick

**kei** : zan and sky got in an argument about how gay lou is

**kei** : *zane

 

_**Zane** changed their nickname to: **zan** _

 

**kei** : then sky added lou to confirm how much he loves sucking cock

**skyboar** : nice @zan

**kei** : and cole changed his nickname thinking that he wasn’t online

**kei** : but shocker

**kei** : he was

**lou lou** : For the last time, I don’t enjoy sucking cock.

**jules** : It is true.

**jules** : He is a bottom bitch.

**blue jay** : Hey guys i’m back from the convention

**blue jay** : What did i miss

**stronk boi** : neuro’s name is norman giles, griffin’s a hedgehog, and apparently my dad got fucked by norman once.

**lou lou** : Cole you take that back right now before I come back home and kick your ass.

**blue jay** : That doesn’t answer who @jules is though

**zan** : me dad

**blue jay** : ...

 

_**blue jay** left **does lou is gey???** _

 

**jules** : ???

**stronk** **boi** : shit did we kill jay?

**lou** **lou** : Language.

**stronk** **boi** : if you can say ass i can say fuck.

**zan** : maybe

**zan** : wait he’s pming me

**skyboar** : wait @jules what did you say about lou

**zan** : He’s freaking out over Father being in the chat.

**zan** : Wonderful.

**jules** : That he is a bottom bitch?

**skyboar** : 1. holy shit doctor julien can curse

**lou lou** : _JULIEN._

**skyboar** : 2. @llyd grmdn u kno what 2 do

**llyd grmdn** : gotcha

**lou lou** : **_LLOYD GARMADON._**

**llyd grmdn** : no it’s llyd can't u read

**sanic** : I can confirm that Brookstone is a bottom bitch.

**sanic** : This is Norman, by the way.

**lou lou** : Piss off, Giles.

**sanic** : @kei Send me an invite, please.

**sanic** : dude wtf did you hack my account or smth

**sanic** : Go back to jerking off, Turner.

**sanic** : ouch

**sanic** : bby y u gotta hurt me like that

**Neuro** : I’m just calling you out.

**Neuro** : Thanks @kei, you get the day off tomorrow.

**sanic** : wait so i can’t give him the day off but you can???

**sanic** : :(

 

_**lou lou** changed **Neuro** 's nickname to: **scrout** _

 

**scrout** : Real mature, Brookstone.

**sanic** : yeah go back to drinking julien’s special milk you huge baby

**jules** : This dick is not going to suck itself, Brookstone.

**scrout** : Thanks, you two.

**kei** : okay okay uh stop

**kei** : not that detailed please

**kei** : i want to add nya here next year so can we keep anything on that level of detail to the nsfw channel i’m gonna make

**kei** : _#pr0nhub_ there

**scrout** : ???

**skyboar** : twas me who told him

**scrout** : Figures.

**jules** : Does that mean I get to post Brookstone’s nudes?

**lou lou** : @jules how did you get your hands on those?!

**scrout** : _waves_

**lou lou** : I hate all of you.

**stronk boi** : does this mean i’m still grounded?

**lou lou** : Not if you throw Giles out of a window tomorrow.

**stronk boi** : nice.

**scrout** : @kei you get another day off if you throw Cole out of the same window afterwards.

**kei** : say no more


	3. #pr0nhub

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> more spicy dramas only this time it's worse

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> funfact: i make 1 chapter of this for ever 1k i hit in the actual fic's draft
> 
> 'adult humour' is in this chapter

_**jules** sent Lnude1.png _

 

**jules** : long thicc dicc

**skip** **to** **my** : JULIEN HOW COULD YOU

**sanic** : wow

**sanic** : I’d tap that

**scrout** : I thought you were kidding.

**scrout** : Also, I didn’t send him your nudes @skip to my

**skip** **to** **my** : FML

**sanic:** should i add the others

**sanic** : they might like this @scrout

**scrout** : Cam first.

**sanic** : kk

**skip** **to** **my** : I hope Zane accidentally shoots you in the face @jules

**jules** : •n•

**sanic** : @CamFox

**CamFox** : ???

**CamFox** : Is that Lou?

**scrout** : CAMELLIA QUICK UPLOAD IT TO THE SCHOOL NETWORK.

**scrout** : I’M OUT SCOUTING.

**CamFox** : I’m not that stupid.

**skip** **to** **my** : Thank you.

**CamFox** : But I did send it to every other staff member I know.

**skip** **to** **my** : I take it back.

**CamFox** : Can I add Victoria?

**sanic** : hell yeah

**sanic** : i'll send you the link

**skip** **to** **my** : Don’t you dare.

**CamFox** : Too late~

**Vic** : Nice @skip to my

**BoyCoy** : same @sanic

**skip** **to** **my** : You added Ash too?

**BoyCoy** : heya ;)

**Vic** : Hey I have some questions @jules

**jules** : Yes?

**Vic** : 1. Who taught you “long thicc dicc”?

**jules** : Cole did.

**jules** : He said that it is “cool” and “hip”.

**BoyCoy** : omfg

**Vic:** okay next

**Vic** : 2. Are you dating Lou

**skip** **to** **my** : no

**jules** : I do not know. @skip to my Are we dating?

**jules** : Aw.

**Vic** : Okay final question

**Vic** : Is it true that you have a piss fetish

**sanic** : wait what now

**CamFox** : Holy shit.

**CamFox** : @Vic coming in and taking no hostages!!

**jules** : No, I don’t have a piss fetish.

**Vic** : @BoyCoy add him

**BoyCoy** : on it

**skip** **to** **my** : Oh my.s

**sanic** : add who???

**DreamEater** : Hello?

**jules** : Oh no.

**jules** : MARK DON’T YOU DARE SAY ANYTHING

**Vic** : @DreamEater is it true that Cobalt Julien has a piss fetish

**DreamEater** : Well...

**jules** : ònó

**DreamEater** : Yes?

 

_**jules** left **the** **academemey** _

 

**DreamEater** : ???

**Vic** : I KNEW IT

**Vic** : THANKS YOU CAN LEAVE NOW

**DreamEater** : Okay?

 

_**DreamEater** left **the** **academemey**_

 

**scrout** : I feel horribly betrayed.

**sanic** : what a fucking plot twist

**sanic** : julien has a piss fetish

 

_**skip** **to** **my** pinned a message to this channel._

 

**skip to my** : I don’t know what to say.

**skip to my** : Was that karma?

**skip to my** : Or just a pure coincidence?

**BoyCoy** : doesnt matter bcoz we pissed off the calmest person nxt 2 bolobo

**BoyCoy** : achievement unlocked lol

**scrout** : I’ve never been more grateful for you being mute.

**BoyCoy** : >:(

**Vic** : Low blow @scrout

**scrout** : It’s not my fault your BF talks like a frat boy :P

 

_**sanic** changed **BoyCoy** ’s nickname to: **fratCoy** _

 

**fratCoy** : y u gotta do this sanic

**fratCoy** : so r00d

**sanic** : >:3c


	4. someone gives griffin admin rights

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> griffin wonders if it’s possible to top julien’s piss fetish

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i’ll format this later

sanic: okay kai gave me admin rights to this channel  
scrout: Oh no.  
sanic: so now there’s a tax to enter  
sanic: everyone has to say a kink  
scrout: NO.  
sanic: you can’t stop me

sanic changed the channel name: Working out those Kinks

sanic: with great power comes great responsibility  
scrout: Turner.  
sanic: wait shit we don’t have everyone here  
scrout: It’s a school night.  
scrout: Not everyone is up at 2am on a school night.  
sanic: hm  
sanic: okay i know who to add  
scrout: Please don’t add him.  
sanic: i’m adding him  
scrout: don’t.  
sanic: hell yeah @PuppetFucker  
PuppetFucker: sup  
scrout: Piss off, Terrell.  
PuppetFucker: nah  
fratCoy: awww yeah blakey’s here  
fratCoy: blakeeeeeeey  
PuppetFucker: brooooo  
fratCoy: broooooooooooooooooooo  
sanic: @adults say a kink  
fratCoy: blake has a stepping kink  
PuppetFucker: bro wtf  
PuppetFucker: how could u  
sanic: don’t like those feet near my dick  
sanic: i personally rate your kink 4/10  
scrout: …I guess we’re actually doing this?  
sanic: hell fucking yes  
CamFox: Norman likes petplay.  
scrout: No.  
CamFox: Dude.  
CamFox: I saw your PMs to Griffin.  
scrout: you little  
sanic: oh snap  
sanic: does that mean i get to call you babe now @scrout  
scrout: afdjkfnjds  
sanic: he just slammed his head on his keyboard

sanic sent IMG_4302.png

sanic: Local Man Gives Up On Protégé  
sanic: i ain’t into that shit but as long as he’s happy i’m happy  
sanic: i guess  
CamFox: Aw, how sweet!  
PuppetFucker: @Vic didnt u tell me ash is a furry  
PuppetFucker: is that a kink  
sanic: jfc  
CamFox: for real tho  
CamFox: @sanic @scrout are you two dating?  
sanic: the cat’s out of the bag normy  
scrout: …  
scrout: Fine. We started dating a week ago.  
scrout: Are you happy with that?  
CamFox: @skip to my you got replaced!! Congrats!!  
fratCoy: stfu  
fratCoy: at least my fursona looks better than u  
sanic: i think master/sub is good  
sanic: too bad norman’s a bottom bitch  
sanic: okay cam it’s your turn now  
CamFox: Uh…  
CamFox: Is it bad if I say I prefer vanilla sex?  
sanic: i respect that  
sanic: but that’s lame  
skip to my: it’s 3 fucking am  
skip to my: which bastard fucking pinged me  
sanic: calm it with the language dude  
CamFox: You got replaced by Griffin.  
skip to my: great  
skip to my: can i go back to sleep  
CamFox: No.  
CamFox: You have to tell us a kink too.  
skip to my: ugh  
skip to my: fine bondage  
skip to my: im going back to bed  
skip to my: fuck you guys  
CamFox: Rude.  
sanic: well that’s everyone who’s online

Griffin added Neuro to the group.  
Griffin added CamFox to the group.

Griffin: you guys wanna go egg lou’s house or smth  
Neuro: Only if Cam’s joining.  
CamFox: I’ll see you guys there.

 


	5. something about angst i guess

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> bad things happen in this chapter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning for suggestion of like, unconsensual shit
> 
> god bless johnathan crawline and his tsundere boyfriend who has a tentacle fetish

kei: @everyone  
kei: 1. hi new people welcome to this server  
kei: 2. what’s the worst thing you guys have ever done  
kei: i ran over a guy on purpose once  
kei: i think he died? don’t really care  
kei: he was a fuckboy, tried to do bad shit to nya  
kei: asshole  
kei: i hope he’s six feet under  
Sky: I don’t think you should be admitting to murder here kai  
Sky: I can’t hack that well  
coke: uhhh...  
coke: i got in a barfight once?  
coke: sky covered up for me, but it was still pretty bad.  
coke: some guy had to get stitches.  
PuppetFucker: n00bs  
PuppetFucker: get on my level  
PuppetFucker: ive killed a bunch of guys  
PuppetFucker: a shitton of em tbh  
PuppetFucker: if any of you kids try to tattle on me  
PuppetFucker: youre next  
Jay: Great!! Wonderful!!  
coke: oh jay, you’re back.  
Jay: I want to die!!  
coke: why?  
kei: ?  
PuppetFucker: i can do that if u pay me  
Jay: I have an interview with Cyrus Borg tomorrow for an internship  
Sky: congrats  
Jay: My portfolio is a complete mess, I can’t show it to him!!  
PuppetFucker: sux 2 b u  
zan: @jules  
Jay: ZANE NOT RIGHT NOW I’M TRYING NOT TO DIE OF A HEART ATTACK  
jules: Walker, there is absolutely no need to panic.  
jules: As long as you mention an interest in AI, or robotics, Borg will definitely hire you.  
Jay: REALLY  
jules: Yes. He has been talking about you lately.  
jules: Nothing but praise, I might add.  
Jay: FJHAFAJHFKDHRIEUHAFJ  
jules: ???

Jay left the academemey

jules: ???  
zan: You did nothing wrong, Father.  
zan: He just needs some time to himself.  
coke: ‘time to himself’  
coke: personal screaming time, you mean.  
Sky: is there ever a time jay doesnt scream  
kei: ^^  
coke: nah.  
coke: wait doc when did you come back?  
jules: I barely missed the kink tax mess.  
jules: @sanic I assume I do not have to pay the tax?  
coke: he’s out of the country doc.  
coke: competition.  
sanic: well i’m back bitches  
sanic: free internet at the airport  
sanic: the bus for the athletes is late, as per usual  
sanic: and no you don’t need to pay the tax  
sanic: no one has said anything worse than you so far  
Norm of the South: Not even Ash being a furry?  
Norm of the South: Or Blake’s stepping kink?  
PuppetFucker: stfu normy  
sanic: hm  
sanic: considering blake’s account name i don’t think doc can 1-up him  
PuppetFucker: this is my side account  
PuppetFucker: unlike the rest of u  
PuppetFucker: i rather not have my actual account be spammed by shit  
sanic: r00d  
Norm of the South: I could add Apollo and get Blake’s real account.  
Norm of the South: I kinda want to know what his real account’s profile pic is.  
PuppetFucker: normy u just want the link to the hentai my pics from dontcha

PuppetFucker sent Screenshot102.PNG

PuppetFucker: u get 1 page  
kei: is that  
kei: a fucking butterfly human mutant  
coke: I think sending us that is hella worse than killing people  
kei: why is it shitting and pissing  
zan: @jules  
zan: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)  
jules: I can’t even  
jules: What the everloving fuck have you been jerking off to Terrell  
jules: I bet you buy those doujins of people shipping you with Apollo and jerk off to those too  
coke: yikes™  
zan: Father pls  
PuppetFucker: nah i jerk off to john  
Norm of the South: The former Ultimate Pornographer?  
Norm of the South: You know him?  
PuppetFucker: 10/10 could be 11/10 but he keeps refusing my offers to get him surgery  
PuppetFucker: but why do u know him normy ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)  
Norm of the South: You can’t prove anything.  
PuppetFucker: hell yeah i can  
PuppetFucker: he told me about the time u paid him 2 make use of @sanic  
PuppetFucker: u paid by cash right  
Norm of the South: Leave Griffin out of this.  
jules: “make use”?  
PuppetFucker: u see doc  
PuppetFucker: for a price  
PuppetFucker: johny kidnaps people and makes them the star of their own flick  
PuppetFucker: normy paid for one of griffy  
sanic: That was you?!  
sanic: Dude what the fuck?!  
sanic: PM me right now @Norm of the South  
sanic: I’m not playing around.  
sanic: I have a gun and I’m not afraid to use it.  
jules: Oh dear.  
Norm of the South: Griffin are you really going to believe him?  
sanic: I knew it was John who kidnapped me because of his stupid voice.  
sanic: I thought a rival wanted revenge!  
sanic: But ooooh no, it was ‘Neuro’ being a little bitch, wasn’t it?  
sanic: “I wasn’t myself back then” isn’t getting you out of this.  
Norm of the South: Darling, please.  
sanic: Actually, nevermind.  
sanic: Don’t PM me.  
sanic: I don’t want to see your pathetic face ever again.  
sanic: When I get back, don’t talk to me, look at me, or even be in the same room as me.  
sanic: I’ll rip your face right off if you try and do anything funny.  
sanic: so fuck off.

sanic left the academemey

Norm of the South: ...  
kei: uh  
kei: do you want to talk about what just happened or

Norm of the South left the academemey

kei: guess not  
CamFox: And they were doing so well, too.  
CamFox: Why did you have to bring that up Blake? You know Griffin’s still recovering from it...  
PuppetFucker: coz it was funny

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> don't ask what the manga thing is because it exists and i've seen it 
> 
> it's cursed and everything kai said happened

**Author's Note:**

> this was a mistake


End file.
